Kim Kardashian has given fans a glimpse into the emotional turmoil she experienced behind the scenes while going through her very public divorce from ex Kanye West.
In season three of The Kardashians, now streaming on Disney Plus, Kim opened up to her mother, Kris Jenner, about the impact of the allegations made about her family.
Earlier this year, Kanye – who goes by Ye – posted a series of screenshots of text messages between him and Kim, in which they appeared to disagree over their children’s schooling and differing parenting styles.
The pair wed in 2016 but divorced in 2021 after a difficult period that saw the “Flashing Lights” rapper divulge personal details about his family and marriage.
In a confessional video tape, Kim, 42, told the cameras: “There’s been a lot going on with Kanye right now… I think at this point, I just assume everything I text Kanye is gonna be put on the internet.
“I think I can handle anything, I just get really heartbroken for my mom, that she has to deal with so much from so many different sides.”
Kim, who is also the founder of luxury shapewear brand SKIMS, continued: “I spent my whole morning having an anxiety attack, I felt like I just couldn’t breathe all day. You know when you’re just on the verge of tears… that’s how I felt all day.”
The model and reality TV star then added that she felt as though her ex-husband “looked down” on her for her sex tape with Ray J that went viral in 2007.
“Even how he looks so down on me for my [sex] tape, brings it up all over town, all over the media. Like, thanks for reminding people once again.”
Kim said that she was worried the allegations and “shenanigans” were going to be more “damaging” for their children – North, nine, Saint, seven, Chicago, five, and Psalm, four – than her sex tape “would ever be”.
“I have to sit here and not say anything, ever, because I know one day my kids will appreciate that,” she said. “And I know that is the best thing for them.”
The Independent has contacted representatives of West for comment.
Kim added that she continues to be Kanye’s “biggest cheerleader” and “blasts” his music in the car when she’s with her children, even though she feels quite differently about her former husband.
“And by the way, I’m the one where s*** could be going down and I get in the car, and every day, the kids want to blast dad’s music and I’m like, ‘He’s the best!’ I put it on and we’re singing along, and inside I’m dying because I will be his biggest cheerleader to them forever, and one day, when they can see for themselves, I’ll answer whatever they want me to. It’s a lot,” she said.
Elsewhere in the episode, Kim alleges that Kanye “started the rumour” that she was having an affair with Canadian rapper Drake, with whom Kanye has had an on-and-off rivalry.
The claim about Drake and Kim was believed to have originated in 2018, after Drake name-dropped someone called “KiKi” in his song “In My Feelings”, which is one of Kim’s nicknames.
Then, in April, the “God’s Plan” rapper sampled an old voice recording of Kim Kardashian speaking about her strained relationship with Kanye West. The rapper’s surprise release in April, “Search & Rescue”, features a clip from the socialite’s reality series Keeping Up With the Kardashians.
“[Kanye] was the one that started a rumour that said I was hooking up with Drake, having an affair,” Kim alleged.